The One hour or so crying

I opened the pc 30 minutes after it was shut down by my sister. I wanted to go online. But unfortunately, I wasn't able to connect immediately because of some connection problems. I restarted the pc twice. After restarting, I still can't connect to the web, and so I decided to kill time by playing some music, looking for a nice dvd to watch while browsing some pictures.

I chose my aunt's favorite song. I will remember you by Sarah McLaughlin. When the intro played, I burst out crying for some reasons. I miss her. Who in the family doesn't? I cried and cried while going through her photos. Her smiles and all. Including the photos at the wake. I repeated the song 4 times. And still am crying while making this. How pathetic I am.

Back when I was still stuck in Surigao, I made a crime. I made a crime inside my head. I wished for aunt's suffering to pass. I wished that for her to feel no more pain and for us to go home. I've wished that even though she was fighting for her life. I learned a lesson the hard way. The hardest I've possibly ever encountered.
Archie was right. "Savor the moment while she's still alive", he said. But I hadn't done that. I was still thinking of myself. How pathetically selfish!

And this is where I end this post.

P.S.

"Savor the moments with your loved ones while they're still around, you don't want to end up regretting for having not said and done what you ought had done."